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Racism in online dating is rife for women of colour - ABC Life
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Dating as a black woman |SBS Life
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Dating as an Aboriginal woman: Here's how I avoid a racist
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Women in Haiti, Peru, Cameroon and the Dominican Republic all threw themselves at his feet — so who the hell was I to refuse him? As a stand-up comedian, my dating life is an infinite well of fodder for my on-stage antics.
Racism in online dating is rife for women of colour
Most of the conversations that other women reserve for their Sunday brunch catch-ups with girlfriends or private group chats are all laid out in their plain, naked glory before a crowd of complete strangers who find endless amusement in the cringe worthy and, at times, heartbreaking reality of being a black woman dating in the age of the internet.
It never has been. If that were the case, then we would be suffering from a dire shortage of breathtaking artwork, poetry, architecture, literature, self-help books, bad movies starring Katherine Heigl, faerie tales and overly-saccharine pop tunes that really do a disservice to address the crushing reality of trying to emotionally, intellectually and physically connect with another human being.
Race does, unfortunately, add another gigantic element of complexity. In my experience, these dynamics with non-black men usually play into one of two narratives: We are constantly self-policing our tone, words and mannerisms to diminish whatever perceived threat we present by virtue of simply existing.
If gaslighting were an Olympic sport then white men who refuse to own the racialised responsibilities of dating outside of their race would be awarded a collective gold medal. In Australia, I found myself completely at odds with the dating environment, where I was treated more like an exotic curiosity than a human being with a job, thoughts, or feelings.